Ok so I’m going to admit I feel very unmotivated to write but I’m pushing through. It’s not that I feel any worse today. I honestly don’t know what it is. We’re here and going so let’s jump on in and see where it takes us…
Yesterday did not go as planned. I did get some stuff accomplished and overall had a good but fairly non productive day. Still haven’t gotten to the 3D printing. My hands have been fairly bad. Refined movements have been very forced, on and off for many days now. I did find the rest of the packing material but didn’t get boxes packed. That’s back on the schedule for today. Didn’t get the RV cleaned up much but did spend plenty of time with Dart. Other than the Dart time I was mostly in my chair, heating pad on my back, sleeping on and off. I know this will pass, just another week or so before I’m completely off that medication thank goodness.
Spending time with Dart! So yesterday wasn’t very productive but was fantastic. Dart got me up three times yesterday and all three times we went for little walks. It made me tired and hurt but I think the exercise is helping physically. Seeing Dart take three little walks in one day was definitely a very positive mental thing for me. He’s been having a rough time. Getting old is hard and I know are time is limited. It makes me so happy that he wants to get up and out. I feel like I’m at least doing my best to give him the best life I possibly can right now. I know he’d love to go out into the forest like the old days. That just isn’t possible right now. Still not driving, don’t know if I ever will and going out alone is a big heck no. I never venture far from home alone. I’m happy to at least have the ability to get him out and we live on one little street outside of town so it’s mostly quiet. As long as he’s getting some enjoyment that’s all that matters to me. I just wish I could give him more.
These rough days are a bit maddening. Not being able to function on top of not being able to function. It feels like I’m in a huge pit of mud and somebody just bashed me over the head. My hands are a bit better today but still numb and refined movement is very difficult. Still feeling ill and not able to eat well. Boost shake are still going down ok though and some all natural stuff. Then the normal problems… tremors are kind bad, I’m rigid and in a lot of pain. Overall I still feel horrible but I think I feel better today than yesterday. Tiny steps forward is all I can ask for at this point.
Today Dart and I have already went for our first of I hope many walks. Just gotta see how he feels. Even if I don’t feel like going and he does I force myself. I’ve done all the normal morning stuff. I think after this we’ll take a little rest and then try to get boxes packed. I’m going to keep the goals for today simple. Tomorrow and Tuesday is filled with doctors, lawyers, the vet and errands. I do have to swap propane tanks either today or tomorrow. Uggg I don’t want to do that, it’s one of the most difficult tasks I have to do. Over the past couple years it’s gotten more and more difficult. I’ll get it done like always because I have no other choice. I either get stuff done or die trying. There’s no way I’ll ever give up. I know one day I’ll see defeat but until that day I’ll give it my all.
Ok well that was a fairly boring update. I guess we’re going to have a few of those from time to time. Not every day can be exciting or world ending. I guess in the overall scheme of things boring is probably good…? I do hate being stuck in the dang RV all day every day with no one really to talk to. I could go inside and talk to my buddy but everybody needs space. I’m more than sure I’m a handful already. I miss working and being out in the world. Not that I would be much even if things in my life were back to normal. The world has turned upside down and I forget that sometimes. Here’s hoping things go back to normal soon and that I get to spend some time somewhere outside of this RV. At least with the warmer weather coming I’ll be able to help Ian with yard work and stuff around the property. I’m looking forward to those exhausting days. I think this winter has taken it’s toll on me and I’m just ready to get out.
With that I think I’ll call this blog good. As always I very much appreciate you being here reading my boringness. I hope you all are doing well and are in good health. I wish you all the best Sunday ever, much love to everyone!